I did something today that makes me feel better than I have in a long time.
A little background story -- my husband has 2 sisters, living in the same area. While the one sister has always been somewhat reasonable, the oldest one has always had a chip on her shoulder, always needed everything her way and made sure we all knew what we did wrong in her eyes. You all probably have similar people in your family. All these years, we have tiptoed around her and kept quiet so as not to upset her. A couple of years ago, there were several incidents with both sisters that finally made us realize that we would be better off not spending any more time with them so all family holiday celebrations since have been spent separately. Honestly, what a relief! But, I have always felt bad for my husband's parents, and my children (even though they were never close to these aunts, uncles or cousins) and now, my grandson, who will never get to play with his second cousins. After all the birthday parties, graduation parties, wedding showers, baby showers, etc. that I assisted with for their families, my family has been totally shunned with our milestone events. How sad for us all. Anyway, back to what I did today. I decided that I can no longer hold these hurts in my heart. I can no longer sit in a church pew each week and listen about forgiveness when I still hold these grievences in my heart. So -- I wrote each sister a letter asking for their forgiveness and letting them know that I forgive each of them. I didn't go into detail - those offences are in the past. I just want forgiveness for any part I played in their obvious unhappiness. I don't expect to hear anything from them. I don't expect that our relationships will change. I don't expect to spend holidays with them. But I expect my heart to be lighter and that I can go about my days without the heaviness of hatred bogging me down. "You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well". As I always have, I wish both of them and their families nothing but good things!
Ciao bellas!
A little background story -- my husband has 2 sisters, living in the same area. While the one sister has always been somewhat reasonable, the oldest one has always had a chip on her shoulder, always needed everything her way and made sure we all knew what we did wrong in her eyes. You all probably have similar people in your family. All these years, we have tiptoed around her and kept quiet so as not to upset her. A couple of years ago, there were several incidents with both sisters that finally made us realize that we would be better off not spending any more time with them so all family holiday celebrations since have been spent separately. Honestly, what a relief! But, I have always felt bad for my husband's parents, and my children (even though they were never close to these aunts, uncles or cousins) and now, my grandson, who will never get to play with his second cousins. After all the birthday parties, graduation parties, wedding showers, baby showers, etc. that I assisted with for their families, my family has been totally shunned with our milestone events. How sad for us all. Anyway, back to what I did today. I decided that I can no longer hold these hurts in my heart. I can no longer sit in a church pew each week and listen about forgiveness when I still hold these grievences in my heart. So -- I wrote each sister a letter asking for their forgiveness and letting them know that I forgive each of them. I didn't go into detail - those offences are in the past. I just want forgiveness for any part I played in their obvious unhappiness. I don't expect to hear anything from them. I don't expect that our relationships will change. I don't expect to spend holidays with them. But I expect my heart to be lighter and that I can go about my days without the heaviness of hatred bogging me down. "You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well". As I always have, I wish both of them and their families nothing but good things!
Ciao bellas!
